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How did the idea for this book come to you?
What made you want to write about infidelity?
I wish I could say that I’m
someone who outlines and has the whole story worked out before I start
writing—it seems like it would be easier that way—but for me it always starts
with the characters. I lived in New York City throughout my twenties, and my roommate
and I would often walk along the Hudson River after work and invent identities
for the people we passed. I do the same thing in airports and restaurants, and
when I write, I feel like I start in much the same way.
Daphne came to me as a very particular woman. She is laser-focused, unwavering,
and she has tightly controlled everything in her life. When I started writing
about her, I wasn’t so much interested in infidelity, though that’s part of her
story. I was interested in seeing how she’d fare if her carefully designed life
unraveled, and in the course of writing about that, it really became a story
about forgiveness. What does it take to forgive someone who’s hurt you and what
does it take to reconcile your pain with your love for that person? I believe
that in any relationship, whether it’s a marriage, a friendship, a family
relationship, etc., you have to forgive each other over and over again, in ways
big and small, to make it work. And you have to learn how to forgive yourself,
too. That, to me, is what the story is really about.
Your
protagonist and her husband are both doctors. Why did you choose this
profession for them, and how does it reflect on their respective characters?
There are several reasons.
Daphne is someone who thrives on specifics and formulas. She’s a fixer, but she
also has a huge heart, and to me, that made her work as an internist a natural
choice. Because she’s so ambitious, I thought it would be interesting to see
how her relationship would fare if there was just a little bit of career
competition between her and her husband, which is why I made Owen a doctor,
too. And then when I decided to set the story in Durham, NC, it became a
no-brainer. Durham is known as “the city of medicine” because of Duke Hospital.
UNC is just a few miles away and also has a renowned medical center. I lived
there for over a decade, and half the people I knew worked in medicine. At one
point, I lived in a cul-de-sac with seven doctors for neighbors. Finally, I
spent the first several years of my career working as a health reporter and was
raised by a woman who read medical books for fun, so it’s a field that always
appealed to me. I couldn’t have written about it otherwise and I called on
several medical friends for advice about everything from how they take notes
after seeing a patient to plausible ailments for my characters.
In your first
book, HOW LUCKY YOU ARE, you wrote about the friendship between three
women and how complicated it can be. In this novel, Daphne¹s sister Lucy is a
pillar of support in some ways, though Daphne doesn¹t always agree with her.
How is it different to write about sisters versus adult female friends?
I think that there are a lot
of similarities. Female relationships are endlessly fascinating to me, in large
part because my friendships with other women are such a big part of my life. In
both books, the women make a lot of assumptions about each other based on the
fact that they’ve made very different life choices—about their careers, their
thoughts on marriage, etc. I think that the three women in HOW LUCKY were more
apt to let each other’s poor behavior slide out of politeness, whereas Lucy and
Daphne will call each other out because they have their family history. Also,
in both cases, there’s a bit of posturing and putting a happy face on things,
though I think that both books show in the end how essential it is to be wholly
yourself with the people in your life. Authenticity is a word that’s thrown
around a lot these days but to me, it’s the foundation of any good
relationship. And for the women in these books, realizing that the
unconditional love that they have for each other won’t fade when they reveal
themselves is a big part of their stories.
So many people
have wanted to know what happens to Daphne after Italy and the book¹s end. Do
you have an idea of this you can share with readers, or are you saving her
next steps for a sequel?
It has been so much fun to
hear from readers about what they think happens to Daphne after the book. I’m
going to hold my cards close to my chest on this in the event that I do write a
sequel, but I will say that I think she settles back in Durham. I won’t reveal
with whom.
You have two
young children. When do you find the time to write, and what is your process
like?
I’ve been self-employed for
over fifteen years, long before I had kids, so that certainly gave me an edge
once I became a mother in terms of having a flexible schedule and being used to
holding myself accountable for getting my work done. There are lots and lots of
things that I don’t do well, but I’m a really diligent person and I stick to a
firm work schedule just like if I worked in a traditional office. If you’re
going to write for a living, you need to approach it as seriously as you would
any other job. There’s no waiting for inspiration to strike—you get yourself to
your desk every day and do the work. It’s as simple as that. And when stuff
comes up, as it inevitably does, I make up for it with early mornings, late
nights, and weekends.
Becoming a novelist is a leap of faith because you typically spend years
writing before you ever know whether you’ll even get a book contract. I
remember sitting at my desk, writing my first book with my first daughter in a
Baby Bjorn, and having lots of insecure moments when I’d wonder whether I’d
ever be successful. But everyone starts the same way. I know novelists who
write before they go to their traditional jobs at software companies and
doctors’ offices. I know novelists who were stay-at-home parents and wrote when
their kids were at school and swim team practice. I wish I could reveal that
there’s more romance involved, or that I once had an epiphany that has since
made the work a breeze, but at the end of the day, it really just comes down to
putting the time in.
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