Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Five Steps to Becoming a Confident Woman



If I were to select one single quality, which is crucial to success in our personal and professional life, without doubt, it would be Confidence. Good news is that it’s a skill, and therefore, it can be developed! I speak from experience, as I used to be so shy that my teachers literally couldn’t hear what I was saying, let alone difficulties I encountered in my social life. This started to change a few years ago. I read loads of findings on psychology, delved into Yoga philosophy and reflected on my experiences, which inspired me to write a book called “The Woman’s Secret: A Novella with Lessons”, where I shared my acquired knowledge. Below, I have outlined five essential steps towards confidence.

Accept who you are. Remember that you are part of the divine design of the Universe. You are already perfect.  So, do what feels right to you and hold true to yourself irrespective of what others think. Don’t seek validation from others. No one knows you better than you do. If your boss thinks you are not creative enough to be promoted, he just didn't see you helping out your niece with a school newspaper! It’s amazing how much we can be affected by someone’s opinion, which is only their own (often incorrect) interpretation of who we are.

Eliminate your negative self-concepts. These are most likely to haunt you from your childhood. Do you still remember an episode when your Mom called you lazy and messy, just because your ideas of a tidy room were not the same? Go through such moments and find evidence from your past that you actually behaved differently and showed the opposite quality. Now every time you want to call yourself silly, just think of that day at work, when you delivered a brilliant presentation and won a big client for your company.

Work on your self-esteem. Shift the focus of your attention towards life situations that made you truly proud of yourself. I am sure there have been plenty. Make it a golden rule to note your little victories and big achievements, because these are the bricks of your confidence wall.

Don’t judge yourself too harshly. We all make mistakes and have our failures. The only difference is how we react. No matter if you burnt your cake, didn’t land that job, or got dumped by your hot new date. It’s not the end of the world, seriously! Take it as a lesson, and move on. And never ever compare yourself to others.

Employ “What-do-I-have-to-lose” attitude. I like to think in terms of risk-vs-reward. When I hesitate about doing something, I imagine the worst case scenario. And normally, it doesn’t turn out to be too bad, which gives me confidence to try and reap my rewards.

And finally, I am sure you already have all you need to be confident! There definitely were situations, when you acted this way. So let your confidence shine through in every aspect of your life and enjoy positive changes .

Please visit this link on Amazon for her novella The Woman's Secret.

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